Wednesday, March 30, 2011

I know sometimes

I know at time your scared, and thats ok
I know sometimes your confused and that natural
I know sometimes your mislead, and that happens
I know sometimes your disappointed and that sucks
I know sometimes your angry, and that troubling
I know sometimes your bitter, and that fades away
I know sometimes your down, and that can linger
But, I also know your strong enough to over come those sometimes

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

3D Leadership

Great leadership can not be contained from a corner office, or from a boardroom. Leadership is the ability to take a vision and make it tangible for those your passionate towards. Since the great economic crisis, the CEO, the small business owner, and anyone in a leadership position was challenged. They were challenged to stir the skills, lives and history of their organization and direct it towards clear waters. This storm that the world is currently in, is building momentum to bring down the best of us. At times, the greatest leaders, find themselves experiencing the hardships of poor continuity planning, lost of market share, lost of public support, decrease in public and private aid, and lost of self motivation. These casualties of war, can leave a state or country in ruins.

So, its critical that leaders restructure and rethink how to conduct business. Easier said than done. As a owner of my own company, mentor and former employee of a marketing firm. I have learned many valuable lessons on how to aid a wound before it starts to bleed. From my experience, the old model business must excel towards a new platform of performance. The top down model, as mention in many business course taught throughout schools must be reconstructed to a sideways organization. What I mean is, The idea of checks and balances is reinforced and quality is measured against quantity.

I strongly believe management should have a 360 view of their business performance and level of integrity in its target market. The customer bases, is becoming more segmented, as more people are exposed to the idea of social media. Social media, which connects the world on a level, that provides, its users with almost real time data to events and information, can expose a  companies brand to negative information in record time, if not monitored and maintained properly. I decided to use, Social media as my prime example because it has taken residence in many organization marketing plans. Everyone, see great potential in using it to build online communities, but many forget how to protect a community from unforeseen dangers. As, I stated before, we live in a world of information. Where, its positive or negative it will travel at the speed of light, and a business, must try to meet the demand of this entity, by training and preparing its employees. So, businesses will have to be adaptable and inventive to keep their brand intact. It has been seen among management, many fundamental breakdown  in design, project management, supportive analysis, budgeting, financial reporting, and performance  monitoring. These, areas of business, under leadership with a 2D approach, could never be properly reported and evaluated for quality, but a 3D approach, data is tangible and transparent. Leadership, wont wait until quarterly projects come in negative to asks what happened, or who was in charge when the product well through the cracks.

Today's leaders have to act as pioneers seeking news methods to make their business grow and expand. Just delegating to workers, isn't enough. Leaders have to reinforce the companies vision of creativity and reliability. If all the employees feel that they are held accountable and have a stake in the companies future. Then they will work towards their goals will more passion. This, will later bring more ideas to the table, that can help cast the business into markets it never saw possible.

Friday, February 11, 2011

The Will Power of Ciaro...

Today is February 11, 2011, just 30 minutes ago.I read breaking news from Cairo Egypt, Mubarak has finally stepped down from power. After weeks of protest and rallying, the will power of a positive force was kindled in man. I personally, haven't seen an organized events unfold, like the one in Egypt for quite some time. For the past ten years, I have watched the media promote, the fall of the economy and the deceit of bad government. It seemed all around the world, bad government seemed to prevail, regardless of those who stepped up. Now, the question is asked where those small rallies and protest in vain. I can strongly agree, No! They were not. This event triggered a ripple in the will power of organized movements, and the power of media when used to promote civil and just causes. The people of Egypt tonight can celebrate, because there efforts were not in vain. Many, were injured, found homeless, jobless and fatigued from the work that comes with fighting for a right. Their victor, can be felt across the globe, as it sparks a mindset to keep fighting for what's right in the world. When someone, you entrusted with your best interest, fails you and refuses to correct or negotiate to correct their wrongs, its time for change, and the people of Cairo rallied together to bring that needed change. I pray, that their efforts aren't cast to the winds, by the new leadership and that this historic moment, is carved in the history books on pages of gold...

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

My Time Vs Her Time


OK, where should I start. This dilemma has troubled many men, especially young men for sometime now. It seems as we start to date and find that special partner in life, we are willing to spend the needed quality time in the relationship in order to make it grow. Yes, men at times will put off hanging out with there friends, make that special moment (quality time) count; and talk, play and hold that deep conversation with our love-one. If this is you, congrats, because your about to be schooled on what's to follow when you decide afterward that you need time for yourself. Right now, your probably scratching your head, and wondering what am I talking about.

Well, it seems after conducting a small survey of guys on this issue, that 23 out of 37 guys feel that their girlfriends never feel fulfilled or satisfied with the time they spend with them. Despite the results, I was not amazed, because it's seems women for some reason don't see the guy's quality time as quality time, but rather interrogation. Women, according to some studies brains are developed more in the language department, thus why they talk more, and are always thinking about things they see and experience. For example, you'll be on the couch with your partner, then suddenly out of the blue, she will just bring up a conversation you guys held two weeks ago, and you happened to say something, she didn't quite understand what you meant. Suddenly, your in an argument, because you can't remember what you said, and she's mad at you for not being able to recall those words you uttered that day. So, now your in the dog house and find yourself spending time with her, just to calm her down. Sucks right! No guy, likes being forced to do anything, or talked down on because he needs time for himself. Why do women do this? doesn't it depend on the guy?

Let's look at the perfect guy scenario, he'll take her out Monday, they watch a movie Tuesday, Wednesday you take her out go bowling, Thursday you stay home and read together, and the coming Monday you happen to want to hangout with your friends. Suddenly, your questioned on your action, and all the time you spent with her is out the window. Guys I've spoken to say this mostly occurs with American girls, because of their insecurity and low levels of self esteem, while foreign women are more secure and reasonable. Why, I ask again is this the case? Most guys, who do right by their girlfriend/wife always try to take care of most household task, then ask; mind you for permission to play an online game or hangout with their buddies. Its a terrible trend that seems to be growing through out the dating world. I wrote this blog to bring attention to this dilemma, ask the question to men and woman, Why? What can be done to advert this mindset? Who's at fault, or can it be isolated?

Looking for feedback,

Until then....

P.S Thanks to the photographer for the great artwork... 8^)

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

The PMS Shield

"You don't understand, I'm very emotional right now, and I could use some compassion"
, yeah guys if you've heard these words uttered to you at least twice a month then you know someone is using the PMS shield. For those that don't know, PMS according to Websters Dictionary is a varying group of symptoms manifested by some women prior to menstruation that may include emotional instability, irritability, insomnia, fatigue, anxiety, depression, headache, edema, and abdominal pain. Ok, after explaining what is it, lets talk how it can affect you, it seems PMS causes men to also experience anxiety, depression, headaches, emotional instability and irritability. (I'll explain later) No surprise there. You see, many women unfortunately during this process tend to use it as a Yell and Curse Free Card and put their male counter part into a world of pain. It's like they want us to feel the pain they feel, so they make life around us as uncomfortable as they are.

Now, is that fair; I don't think so, a study conducted sometime back, looked to find if men also experienced symptoms their female partner may experience when they are menstruating. Dr Aimee Aubeeluck of the University of Derby, surveyed 50 men and 50 woman, regarding symptoms normally associated with PMS, and his study found that men actually scored higher than women in everything apart from water retention. Interesting as that may sound, I'm not about to run out and buy a box of pad and sing with my partner about how we can make it. I'm looking at, what if men acted the same way women did, and used it as a excuse at time to get things done or delay them. Can you imagine, if you told your girlfriend or wife, you couldn't wash clothes today, due to pain in your lower back, or an reoccurring headache. I guarantee you will be called a coward of wimp, yet women often brag about how they can handle more pain than men, yet when they get a headache, they can't see past you wanting to go out to brief moment, or play a online game with your buddies when they are PMS'ing lol

Another study came up with another gem I like to call " Irritable male syndrome", this process occurs in man on daily basis. Unlike women who experience PMS for 6 days out of the month on average, IMS occurs in men very often do our level of testosterone fluctuations through out the day, thus resulting in mood swings, stomach cramps and even hot flashes. So, guys, when your girlfriend or wife, comes down on you hard regarding what your not doing during their PMS breaks, you can share with them what your bodies not letting you do, and test their reactions to your response. I know, you'll get an ear full, but women should not use this process of life as an shield, so they can just take advantage of our feeling for them, and try to walk over us.

For the women that don't abuse, this piece is not towards you. I'm no fool, I understand its a terrible experience to go through, but in life the way you approach a situation can determine how you come out of it. Somethings can be taken in strides, and others slowly with patience. This on the other hand, should be take with respect towards ones-self and others.

Until then...

For more information on IMS
Irritable male syndrome

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Give or not to Give

Well Valentines Day's came and went. Many people shopped online or at stores to purchase their love one clothes, candies, teddy bears and even flowers. This day is set aside to help give that guy or girl the opportunity they probably avoided or neglected to do; and express to their special someone that they care. This day is known to cause many people mostly men, high levels of stress. This year was interesting, I didn't' see the same aggressive attitude towards the day, as during previous years. I saw many flower stands full of fresh roses for purchasing, and the many card stores didn't run out of cards as quickly. Then I thought maybe the so called recession set in and slowed down the past valentines day warriors from their hunting, but in all something changed.

Are people finally starting to realize that valentines isn't as effective a holiday it once was. Years ago, valentines often set the tone of your relationship for the rest of the year. February is often a cold and dreary month, people often aren't at their peak levels, they're still working out what plans they would like to carry out for the year, and who if possible they would want to see standing by their side during their transitions. This day was crucial to that planning, but now the flame has dwindled some. It seems from what I'm hearing, people have gotten wiser to the meaning of the holiday. Basically, if your love one, never expressed their love for you in months leading up to Valentines, then chances are what ever love they show, is months old. People want to know their loved, if possible everyday. I've learned women love are more receptive to a valentines day gift, when the gift giver has been giving all year long. Its like a parent, whose child only says, "I love you" when their birthday is coming up, or Christmas is around the corner. It tend to put a bitter taste in your mouth if this happened to you. So, from my experience, its best to show love long term, than for the short term.
Now, what if you can't buy that expensive gift you thought about, my recommendation make something. Yes people, the gifts that last the longest are those that have sentimental value. Hallmark is good, but a card with your own words will end up in their diary or lockbox before the trash bin. Also, its good to listen for clues, your love one may hint to you regarding their past valentines day experiences. A good listener can make a word of difference in someones life.
Also, take into consideration, gift that tend to do more than just sit on a desk, carry more value also. I brought a girl once, a heart shaped globe, thought it was different, gave it a shot. Man, was I was surprised when I found out, she never kept it out for others to see. You see, I didn't realize that the gift wasn't practical enough, and didn't give off the attention she wanted to herself all the time. You see, at times when we had fights, she didn't want to a heart shaped globe, so that globe now became a weapon, if thrown hard enough. lol So, my advice get a gift, when a gift will do. lol

So, this event brings me to my next point, what do you when the love you give isn't reciprocated? How do you handle that moment. Do you walk away, or hand around and follow your pride? Many couples face this dilemma everyday. You're out for night on the town, and suddenly the lights are just right, and the street energy is lively, and then those words are uttered. "I LOVE YOU", and suddenly you can count the seconds it took for a response. Your heart stops, suddenly the day's not going so well, your palms begin to sweat, and you eyes waver, crap your on a limb, then suddenly you get "Oh how cute"...

How cute, how Cute! How nerve racking you mean. Guys some advice, be-careful with the words you utter out, because you can never take them back. Joke or not, its out there, and the way they are digested by the receiving end can really turn your day around. If you experience this event, please feel free to share, and comment.

Until then....

Monday, February 8, 2010

The allure of the chase

The question was ask: Why do people like to chase, what's no available to them?

Chase, according to Webster dictionary it's an earnest or frenzied seeking action. I guess in other words, in order for someone to chase after someone else there has to be some driving force to push the idea that you can reach or catch your target. Love, according to scientists, it's a chemical reaction that occurs in our brains, that makes us feel a connection with someone. If that's the case, whats the thought process or chemical that everyone has to make them react with others who's chemical reaction is going off with someone else. Now, that I think about it, now that even sounds to complex to take in.

Many people claim they often fall for someone, who's involved in a relationship, for the challenge. The ability to make someone who claims they're in love, fall out of love. Its amazing, how this happens almost everyday, is it a chemical imbalance as scientist claim, or humans just creatures of nature trying to widen their territories. Now, the difference between us and the monkey, is our ability to communicate and react to situations and events with logical skills. I decided to talk about this topic, because its seems to occur every often, and the results never seem to differentiate. What makes a person, go against the grain, and seek love that's taken. Was it a romance that occured to late in life, was there filtering before comittments were made, or are people just that devious? A growing number of men married and dating are having a hard time dealing with this situation. It seems according to a female friend of mines, the number of decent men available to bring home to mom and dad is decreasing at an alarming rate. Women, seem to have realized this, and are willing to sacrifice their pride to chase a guy they feel will be a better match for them, than the girl they are currently dating. Thus, guys now a have to keep their guard up even more. Guard, I mean their social interaction skills can't be so charming, and so honest. What happen to the days of telling a girl, or even a women good morning, with out theme expecting something in return. It seems, people are kind jesters as keys to the city of relationshipville.

Guys, has this ever happen to you. You come to work, your female counterpart looks down, so you ask her whats wrong, she replies with a sad story or event. Then the next week, suddenly she's buddy buddy, but it seems more than that. suddenly you the guys she's always going to for consoling, then the ring on your finger doesn't mean so much to her ambitions. Now, I'm not beating on girl, guys do this also, but its just more aggressive on the female end. Why! I ask myself does this occur, you detect their ambitions aren't so pure, and question them on it, so suddenly your on their hater list and they start bad mouthing you to all the other female co-workers. What happen to the balance? So guys, here's a list of lines to look out for and question when a girl may be trying to chase you when your take:

1. She constantly ask you how the married life
2. She's always questioning why you got married
3. She some how compares her actions to that of your girlfriend or wife
4. She never want to hear about the making up you and your partner makes after a fight
5. She's always on shaky terms with her present love
6. She always wants to make sure she keeps in contact with you, but you can't call her at certain times
7. She's nervous when you special holiday come around, and your not available to hang out
8. She never answers her phone around you
9. She always presents herself as the answer to your dreams
10. When desperate, will follow you around

So guys, use these key point at work and even at your best friends house.

I'll post more of my finding in the future. You can post anything you came across as well, hey were in this together.

Until then.....